"It's time to come home. I promise you won't have...
SON SAID I WILL BUT DAD IM AFRAID SQUEEDOOLEEDOODEEDODEEDOO WAHNAHNAH
The very last Calvin & Hobbes Comic
castielhasthephonebox: clockworktimebomb: whydontyougofuckadinosaur: sherlocktardisbluescarf: finchhasthetardis: thepurplejunkie: cams92: grandmanoiseverything: himapapaftw: heirofturnips: wheretheshallowsbreak: candyexe: zaxcistea: pers0na: arjaaah: lundyngonzales: As tumblr gets all angry over this, nobody thought it appropriate to actually...
The Same Picture of Dave Coulier Every Day →
csingel: Well, that’s it, internet. Every great idea is done. Pack up and go home. FINALLY
me: im trying to put together a proper pun
the only thing i got so far is a dropped calls/dropped balls thing
i'll keep working at it
Darren: hahaha okay
me: "I should've never gotten that dog pheremones app"
i think thats the best choice
Darren: how bout
me: "hello? hello? Frank, am i talking to your dog's balls again?"
"Mr. Testacles, I know you're very busy but we have GOT to get those contracts signed by tomorrow!"
Darren: "hi, this a dog's ballsack. I'm just calling to see if you'd like to renew your subscription to the New York T- hello?"
"This is reception for Dog Dick Enterprises LLC, how can I help you?"
"What? Right test-No! I tell them over and over again, this is the number for LEFT testacle! Christ! You're calling during my family dinner!"
"Balls, Balls, and Dogcock, this is Balls speaking"
"No, this isn't a prank! My name is Harry Ballsonya! No, don't hang up!"
"Help! I've fallin and I can't get up!"
"yes, i'd like to report an emergency, it appears i'm trapped beneath a dog"
Darren: "Hi Lisa, it's your dermatologist. Your tests came back postive for canine testicals, so we're thiking the rash is probably from you rubbing - hello? Lisa?"
thats a good one
"GET OFF ME DOG! UGH!"
me: "You gotta help me man, the neutering is scheduled for tomorrow! I don't know! Just do something!"
Darren: "yes can you help my dog? there's an iphone growing from his balls."
me: "Siri can you find me showtimes for Happy Feet 2 tonight? Wait, what the crap? This is an iPhone4?! Who switched my phone!"
"Alright Jonathan. You give me my bone back, I give you your phone back. And honestly, if you put my bone in your balls, I really don't mind at all."
"stop crying jonathan. be a fucking man."
me: "baby I know I said I'd be home early tonight, but I'm a ball."
funnier that way
"umm, 2. wait, hang on. how do you define household?"
me: "And then, and you're not gonna believe this Marcy, she told me that I was irrational one, and of course, I said nothing, because im a ballsack"
me: glad we could go on this journey together
Darren: me too
me: DogBallJokeQuest 2011
Tycho - A Walk Chillgasm
Anonymous asked: Not only do I love your blog ( heh found it ) but I also am secretly infatuated with you. K. here we go I got this idea from a spam msg I received on Facebook lol.. I know you like me but were always way too shy to say so :3 go hit up crushmasher(dót)com (uhh it wont let me do a regular link) then make an acct there. Search for the profile 'justmeandu33' ( obv me ) I posted body...
Mysterious Massive Attack demo. Dark, ambient,...
These artists are saving hip-hop.
corsolis: Shabazz Palaces Kendrick Lamar Danny Brown ASAP Rocky Big K.R.I.T. Mr. Muthafuckin’ eXquire THEESatisfaction Das Racist Main Attrakionz Jay Electronica Lil B Kinda
John Darnielle's "100 Reasons Why 'Ignition -... →
fuckyeahthemountaingoats: slamdanceonyourgrave: 14. And then we enter into the levels of reference again, which is where I get completely dizzy “Rollin’ on 24s/while they say on the radio”: what do they say? Oh, good God, they say what critical theory thought they’d say: “This is the remix to igntion” 15. which is to say that the song describes a party where they’re listening to the radio...
me: psh paltry
Ian: A. don't use words i have to look up
B. don't hate on teh amount of jello shots
jonbershad: One day I want to be in a movie and say a line like “They have created something more than twice the size of any Lycan I’ve ever seen!” and I want to say it dead serious and I want other actors around me to have really scared faces as we all reflect on the horror of what I just said. Twice the size? Twice the size?! Casting agents, please make this happen. I would also like to be...